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Professor McPhadden's World of Words, Wonders and Weirdos!




Too lazy to read the full blog? Here is a video version of 'report card euphemisms'!

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about us

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The Professor

Welcome to my blog on all things strange and unusual. My name, in the unlikely event that you have not heard of me, is Professor Melvin McPhadden. Actually, even if you have heard of me, that is still my name. 


As Professor of  Paranormal Studies at Murkville University, I have spent a lifetime studying the secrets of the spirit world. I have combed the cobwebbed corners of creepy castles and groped my way through grimy graveyards in the dead of night. I have been described as fearless, bold, a genius and a giant in the world of paranormal research. I am, indeed, all of these things.

A word of recommendation from one of my biggest fans:

‘Melvin is the first person I would call if I needed help with ghosts, phantoms, spirits, spooks, apparitions, specters, or my garage door opener.’

Mrs. McPhadden (Mom)

Rob Taylor

Rob Taylor is a writer who is looking for an opportunity to see his books in print. If you are interested in learning more, please email him:

He is a good friend of Professor Melvin McPhadden. He has the unenviable task of helping the Professor put his thoughts in order and avoid writing anything that could lead to an expensive legal misunderstanding.

Rob has written four children’s books; ‘Professor Melvin McPhadden’s Absolutely Essential Guide to Ghosts and Ghost Hunting’, ‘The Museum of Fearsome Frights and Nasty Nightmares’, ‘Bizarre Beasts and Mysterious Monsters’ and 'A Kids' Guide to the Secret Life of Words'. The second book is all about cryptozoology; the study of strange creatures such as The Loch Ness Monster, Bigfoot and Mothman. The third book is a humorous children’s guide to vampires, witches, mummies and other legendary creatures of book and film. The fourth book explores the weird and often hilarious origins of everyday words.


Here is a synopsis of his first book. Hopefully the Professor won't read this bit:


A pompous ghost hunter and his bungling team investigate hauntings with hilarious consequences!

Are ghosts less scary if you picture them in their underwear? This is the kind of vital question that you will find answered in ‘Professor Melvin McPhadden’s Absolutely Essential Guide to Ghosts and Ghost Hunting’. In this book, the foolish Professor and his crew of dim-witted ghost hunters lead us through some of his most baffling and comical cases. 

Rob has been living in the USA for 25 years but he is still pleased to relate that his English accent can still get him out of difficult situations by making him sound much more charming and intelligent than is actually the case. He loves old, scary movies and football (the kind you play with a round ball). 



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